Faith Questions

I just finished reading a book called The True and Outstanding Adventures of the Hunt Sisters, by Elisabeth Robinson. A debut novel, it isn't the type I would usually read. For one thing, it contains a fair bit of profanity and is written completely in letter form, which I found mildly annoying until I got used to it. The main character, Olivia Hunt, is the author of all the letters, written to various characters in the book. It took me a while to get into the story because part of the plot involves her life as a Hollywood producer, which I totally did not relate to. But the other part is all about her relationship with her younger sister, Madeline, who is battling leukemia and whom she deeply loves. Olivia is by nature a cynical person, and Maddie, one who embraces life and love and leans into every circumstance of life with gusto, whether good or bad. She's optimistic, hopeful, full of faith and dreams. Olivia wrestles with questions of faith, as she sees her sister wrestle with living and dying. She says in a letter to Maddie:

When I look at the night sky and consider my relationship to it--one puny organism, out of billions of puny organisms, just sitting in the remains of an ancient chapel, breathing in and out, watching for shooting stars, trying to pick out the constellations, still--this moment both grounds me in the tactile reality of dirt, air, and skin and also lifts me up to believe that there must be someone, something up there, there must be. While floods and famine and cancer certainly suggest the universe is pure chaos and randomness, the beauty in the elaborate and connected natural order of things--of the veins of a leaf, of a river, of a bolt of lightning, to the veins in my hand--suggest there is a purpose and meaning and, yes, maybe even something bigger and better than us. And more than the incredible natural order of the universe, there is love: how can love be the product of anything short of divine?

I love to hear faith questions. It suggests a wrestle with God, as Jacob did when he insisted that God bless him. It says, I don't have the answers, but still I will trust You. Steven Curtis Chapman and his wife, MaryBeth were on Good Morning America this week talking about their excrutiating loss of their five-year-old daughter, Maria. I felt like rising to my feet and applauding at Steven's response when Robin Seward asked them if this loss has caused them to question their faith. He very honestly answered, yes, then went on to explain that they have so many questions and so few answers. But, he said, that's what faith is all about.

Real faith is believing and trusting God even when you don't understand. When you're heartbroken. When you feel like you can't go on another day. When you're confused. You move forward in faith trusting God to bring you through this thing somehow, knowing He always has your best interest at heart. He cries with us and shares our sorrow. He holds us up when our legs give way. Psalm 56:8 says, "You keep track of all my sorrows. You have collected all my tears in your bottle. You have recorded each one in your book (NLT)." What a tender God we serve.

We all have questions. Sometimes they're accompanied by a fair bit of doubt. But when we can say, I'm going to trust God in this anyway, our faith grows. Our strength swells. And before we know it, we're soaring on the wings of eagles through His grace.