Take Care

Blah. Exhausted. At the end of my rope. That's how I'd been feeling. Maybe a little angry and resentful, too. I felt grouchy and put-upon whenever anyone asked me to do anything for them. Especially my family. It seemed to me that everyone's needs always came before my own. If one of them needed something, I dropped whatever I was in the middle of to deliver a forgotten item, look up an invoice amount, check on a fact or two or whatever else the immediate emergency required. Meanwhile, my to-do list grew and grew. Laundry, grocery shopping, dishes, paying bills, helping with homework, writing on deadline, studying for the Sunday school class I teach, answering phone calls... you get the idea. When would my needs matter? When would my tasks be as important as everyone elses? I can throw an impressive pity party complete with streamers, confetti and gourmet food.


So what was the problem? Me. As much as I hated to admit it, I was the problem. It wasn't my family (as I'd hoped). I was the one putting unrealistic expectations on myself. No one asked me to drop what I was doing. I happen to have a very sweet husband and a fabulous daughter. Their requests weren't demands. They were simply requests that I could say no to or do at a more convenient time. But the real, down deep problem was that I was failing to feed my spirit.


As a writer, part of my job is reading. But I felt guilty sitting around reading a book when my husband was working his tail off to make a comfortable living for us, and my daughter was slaving away at school. Was it OK to sit and quietly do something I love to do? Or what about taking a nap when I felt tired? I felt like I had to sneak it in without anyone knowing about it. How ridiculous! So here's what I did.


I decided I'd do whatever my spirit told me to do. If I felt tired, I laid down. If I felt like reading, I read. I treated myself to lunch out if I felt like it. I exercised at the gym and ate right. And wonder of wonders, I had more energy. I actually felt more like tackling my to-do list. I was more pleasant to be around. I treated myself as I would others.

When was the last time you read a book, took a bubble bath, or had a good laugh with a friend? Don't wait until your tank's on empty. Fill yourself with the blessings God has placed in your life. Live the abundant life He promised you. Enjoy it, free of guilt. We can't take care of those He's entrusted to us if we haven't first taken care of ourselves.